"What Is It Like To Be A Teen Girl?"

What Is It Like to Be a Teen Girl? Part 1…

Angie Salzmann MA, LPC

When I was in graduate school, I undertook a daunting yet fascinating course entitled Psychology of Women. As a student at Texas Woman’s University, I knew that I would learn of the history of discrimination against women and the lasting results of that discrimination, whether it existed in the workplace, at home, or in religion. I reasoned that I would learn about things like patriarchy, social justice, abuse, socialization, and stereotyping. I also expected to learn about the psychological effects of life experiences that are unique to women, such as pregnancy and childbirth. What I did not expect to learn involved a term that was very new to me: objectification.

In their 1997 article, Fredrickson & Roberts assert that our society as a whole tends to treat women in terms of their physical bodies, thereby treating women as objects, rather than as people of equal standing and value with men. They also posit that women, in turn, tend to come to think of and to treat themselves as objects as well. Specifically, Fredrickson & Roberts state, “In other words, when objectified, women are treated as bodies—and in particular, as bodies that exist for the use and pleasure of others […] Objectification theory posits that the cultural milieu of objectification functions to socialize girls and women to, at some level, treat themselves as objects to be looked at evaluated.”

Now, perhaps this concept seems far-fetched. Perhaps I am beginning to lose some of my readers because some of you may think that I am about to go on a rant. Please stick with me just a bit longer.

Over the last several years, I have had the wonderful opportunity to work with many teen girls and young women. Their stories and personalities have filled me with laughter as well as pain. What is unfailingly true about these clients is that they are all remarkable in their own ways. Each one comes into my office with such strength, courage, and beauty, despite whatever her struggles are that I am consistently moved by them. Without fail, I continue to learn from these inspiring people as I strive to help them through their troubles. They have taught me a great deal, especially regarding what it is currently like to be a teenage girl.

Recently, I found myself thinking about Objectification Theory after meeting with numerous teen girls who come in and out of my office on a regular basis. They tell me about their adventures and misadventures in dating. They cry as they tell me about their perceived flaws. They hang their heads in shame. They ask me why they’re not worth being treated well. They refer to themselves in terms of what they have to offer as a commodity in exchange for attention. They criticize and demean themselves as they would any undesirable object. Even as I work with them to help them in their journeys, I am persistently struck by frustration that circumstances, actions, and society have brought these young women to these dark places. Additionally, I find myself wondering what can be done to help prevent this.

I have come to imagine what a lovely change we would make if we could stop ourselves from referring to people by their body parts rather than as fully human, fully valuable, and fully capable people. I think of the amazing changes each of us would see in ourselves if we were able to stop dissecting ourselves like objects. I think, too, then, what beautiful growth we would begin to see if we were to view our girls and our women as God does—valuable (Proverbs 31:10) and powerful (Proverbs 31:17).

References

Fredrickson, B., & Roberts, T. (1997). Objectification Theory: Toward  Understanding Women’s Lived Experiences and Mental Health  Risks. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 21, 173-206.